The other night as I was in the waiting room for a focus group I was participating in, I was totally shocked by the actions of this woman in the room.
Just imagine you're sitting in a room with complete strangers. It's totally silent. People are thumbing through magazines and then BLAM 'No Boundaries Lady' enters the room.
This woman is talking loudly on her cell phone not noticing 12 other people are in the room sitting in absolute silence. I've seen where people enter a room while talking, but quickly finish up their conversation. But not this lady. In fact, she got louder and would often pull the phone away to look at a text message she received as she was talking.
It wasn't that she was talking on a cell phone in a room where no else was talking, it is the conversation she was having that made several of us look up at one another in complete shock.
She was talking about someone's child she knew that had just drowned in a pool. Totally oblivious to how loud and how personal she was getting. It was somewhat disturbing to be in the middle of such a conversation. She was clearly upset which led to my ultimate thought/observation: Why are you even here?
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Sunday, July 1, 2012
Living in My Own Episode of Hoarders: Buried Alive..or Why I know I'll Never Own 43 Cats.......
Here in the U.S., we are slammed with every conceivable t.v. show imaginable. There are shows based upon families with multiple children, others about brides who are bat-shit crazy and truckers who drive long distances on ice in the dead of winter to deliver their shipments. I know I blogged in the past about a show entitled Hoarders and how watching it made me want to clean my house (I later made the connection that the people they profiled typically had multiple cats which are always found dead under stacks of rubble and realize if you own more than 40 cats you'll more than likely end up on the show).
While Hoarders is a show that amazes me (they usually cart away 8 tons of garbage in just 2 days) I've decided there has to be at least 400+ people for every house they profile to ensure it's clean in 48 hours.
Wait... I'm getting distracted. I want to tell you why I feel as though I'm one of the people profiled on Hoarders: Buried Alive (okay, not really because I don't own 43 cats, but I do have a room that is jammed packed).
When I found out I got a job in April and could work out of the house, I asked my husband to make a multi-shelf bookcase. It's July 1st and my dining room is still crammed packed, BUT the bookcase is finally painted. It's not completely dry and the room is covered with drop cloths (which my husband has promised will be put away tonight along with his painting implements and other stuff before I start work tomorrow), but I'm just thrilled it's finally painted.
I admit I'm a bit to blame, but I think his confidence in how long it would take was exceedingly high. I think he was under the impression it would take a day to cut the wood - a couple of hours to put together and a couple of hours to paint the case -- ummmm...NO! My husband is very handy, but I think he may have been watching too many home improvement shows where every home project is completed under 30 minutes.
I have to wait for the shelves to dry before putting things in its place and with the humidity as high as it is in CT, I'm not taking any chances. I'm going to double the normal waiting time before putting the office back together. I'm just hoping things are back in place before the end of the month because I'm starting to lose my mind.
With everything in the room I have to walk through to get to every room in the house, I've noticed how living in clutter, over a really long time, depresses the hell out of me. I can now see how most of the people they profile on the show feel defeated and don't know where to start. I have gone through everything and although the clutter is organized, I still have to maneuver through the room to pass through.
I'm just thankful I don't own 43 cats because I know I may not see them in between the stacks of books and office supplies on and under the table....And as my husband just said: "You don't want to find a flat cat".
While Hoarders is a show that amazes me (they usually cart away 8 tons of garbage in just 2 days) I've decided there has to be at least 400+ people for every house they profile to ensure it's clean in 48 hours.
Wait... I'm getting distracted. I want to tell you why I feel as though I'm one of the people profiled on Hoarders: Buried Alive (okay, not really because I don't own 43 cats, but I do have a room that is jammed packed).
When I found out I got a job in April and could work out of the house, I asked my husband to make a multi-shelf bookcase. It's July 1st and my dining room is still crammed packed, BUT the bookcase is finally painted. It's not completely dry and the room is covered with drop cloths (which my husband has promised will be put away tonight along with his painting implements and other stuff before I start work tomorrow), but I'm just thrilled it's finally painted.
I admit I'm a bit to blame, but I think his confidence in how long it would take was exceedingly high. I think he was under the impression it would take a day to cut the wood - a couple of hours to put together and a couple of hours to paint the case -- ummmm...NO! My husband is very handy, but I think he may have been watching too many home improvement shows where every home project is completed under 30 minutes.
I have to wait for the shelves to dry before putting things in its place and with the humidity as high as it is in CT, I'm not taking any chances. I'm going to double the normal waiting time before putting the office back together. I'm just hoping things are back in place before the end of the month because I'm starting to lose my mind.
With everything in the room I have to walk through to get to every room in the house, I've noticed how living in clutter, over a really long time, depresses the hell out of me. I can now see how most of the people they profile on the show feel defeated and don't know where to start. I have gone through everything and although the clutter is organized, I still have to maneuver through the room to pass through.
I'm just thankful I don't own 43 cats because I know I may not see them in between the stacks of books and office supplies on and under the table....And as my husband just said: "You don't want to find a flat cat".
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Curiosity Gets the Cat.....
In this scenario, I'm the cat.....
Let me explain. A couple weeks ago, I was staying at my sister's house. I didn't bring my laptop and wanted to check my email so I used hers. My husband sent me a document to read and as I was downloading the document I noticed there was one entitled "dating.xls".
My sister is single and her love of excel made me naturally think it was hers. Never did it enter my head that this document, housed in the download documents, belonged to anyone other than her. Curiosity got the best of me. I mean, why, or better yet, what would one capture in a dating excel spreadsheet.
Well....I was in for a surprise. I opened it up to discover pictures of women. I was saddened that she didn't feel comfortable telling me she was gay. I immediately talked with my husband and realized she would tell me when she was ready and it wasn't my place to bring it up. [Note: I didn't really realize this. He told me to shut my pie hole and when she was ready to tell me she would. I secretly hoped this was sooner than later]. However, I was totally disgusted because the women in the spreadsheet were half her age and the comments were pretty superficial. More about what the girl looked like than the conversation she had with her.
I was dumbfounded. I'm incredibly close with my sister and couldn't believe she was trolling for young women and how shallow she was. Seriously, I thought to myself, what a shallow, dirty letch. Didn't she know the rule about the lowest appropriate dating age? 1/2 your age + 7.
Luckily for me, I only had to hold my tongue for 1 day. The next morning we were talking about the speed of her computer and it came up that she couldn't believe she still had the dating spreadsheet on her computer [Background: A week or so before my mother died, my sister had told me the story she read on the Internet about this guy who tracked his dates on a spreadsheet and downloaded it so she could send it to me. She knew how much I love to goof on her about putting almost every piece of data in an excel spreadsheet. Well, we got distracted with life events and she never sent to me.]
I confessed to downloading the spreadsheet, and then, confessed my thoughts. I told her how I couldn't believe she'd think it okay to be such a letch just because she jumped the fence. She laughed at me.
I guess that's what I get for being curious. I'm glad I only had to wait 24 hours to learn my sister wasn't a creepy, shallow being.
Let me explain. A couple weeks ago, I was staying at my sister's house. I didn't bring my laptop and wanted to check my email so I used hers. My husband sent me a document to read and as I was downloading the document I noticed there was one entitled "dating.xls".
My sister is single and her love of excel made me naturally think it was hers. Never did it enter my head that this document, housed in the download documents, belonged to anyone other than her. Curiosity got the best of me. I mean, why, or better yet, what would one capture in a dating excel spreadsheet.
Well....I was in for a surprise. I opened it up to discover pictures of women. I was saddened that she didn't feel comfortable telling me she was gay. I immediately talked with my husband and realized she would tell me when she was ready and it wasn't my place to bring it up. [Note: I didn't really realize this. He told me to shut my pie hole and when she was ready to tell me she would. I secretly hoped this was sooner than later]. However, I was totally disgusted because the women in the spreadsheet were half her age and the comments were pretty superficial. More about what the girl looked like than the conversation she had with her.
I was dumbfounded. I'm incredibly close with my sister and couldn't believe she was trolling for young women and how shallow she was. Seriously, I thought to myself, what a shallow, dirty letch. Didn't she know the rule about the lowest appropriate dating age? 1/2 your age + 7.
Luckily for me, I only had to hold my tongue for 1 day. The next morning we were talking about the speed of her computer and it came up that she couldn't believe she still had the dating spreadsheet on her computer [Background: A week or so before my mother died, my sister had told me the story she read on the Internet about this guy who tracked his dates on a spreadsheet and downloaded it so she could send it to me. She knew how much I love to goof on her about putting almost every piece of data in an excel spreadsheet. Well, we got distracted with life events and she never sent to me.]
I confessed to downloading the spreadsheet, and then, confessed my thoughts. I told her how I couldn't believe she'd think it okay to be such a letch just because she jumped the fence. She laughed at me.
I guess that's what I get for being curious. I'm glad I only had to wait 24 hours to learn my sister wasn't a creepy, shallow being.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Phew.......
I'm starting my 4th week in my new job and you know what....after 4 years of being unemployed, it felt as though nothing has changed. Although, my attitude has.
For the past 3 weeks, I've been asked: "How do you like the new job?" Ummmm.. I'm thankful for the position and appreciate that I have a job. However, I've learned some key things about me I've carried into this job and here they are:
1. I work to live, not live to work. I know people who live to work and am thankful there are people on the earth who are wired this way, but it's not me.
2. I don't necessarily believe that everyone has to follow their passion as their career. I LOVE cooking, food, eating food, farmer's markets. BUT, do I want to work long hours as a chef? Nope. I'll just keep having my monthly dinner parties instead. For me, I am thankful I have identified my passion and will always have it to relieve stress.
Okay...the rest are observations....
3. My home office is located in NJ...exactly 4 miles from my last employer's home office (yes, I do find this weird). For the 1st 2 weeks I traveled to NJ (luckily, my boss has no issue with me working remotely), but as I was driving the 94 miles to the office, I discovered NJ has a State car -- the BMW SUV. I swear BMW must have secretly left their SUV in the driveways of NJ residents. As I was driving down the highway, there was one in every lane of the 3 lane highway. The runner-up car was Lexus - any make and model.
4. I'm 46, but am still amazed at the stupid things that come out of people's mouths. Day 1, someone was helping me get my badge. They actually said something like this to me: "You know, I'm only taking you around because I was told to". Really? I knew you weren't doing this out of the kindness of your heart, but sometimes, just sometimes, you need to not share your inner voice. I now know how a deer feels when it comes face-to-face with the bright headlights of a car at night. I believe I said: "Thank you, I appreciate it".
5. I think the IT people either hate me or expect an invitation to my house at Thanksgiving. I believe I've called them more than I've talked with my boss. Yes. I'm tech retarded. But, if it weren't for employees like me, these people wouldn't have a job. So....maybe, they really do love me deep down.
6. There is no such thing as the magic cleaning fairy. If she exists, she doesn't come to my house and am pissed. I guess I forgot I no longer have that extra 9 hours a day to clean one or two rooms. If you're wondering why it takes me 9 hours to clean one or two rooms, well, let me tell you why -- when I clean I have a secret cleaning tool and it's called PRO-CRAS-TI-NATION. Don't mistake it with a feather duster or vacuum, it resembles a couch, a t.v., a computer or book. None of which help me empty a dishwasher.
7. Last, but not least, I love working from home. I'm more focused and can wear yoga pants and slippers to work.
Those are my observations about starting work again -- my other non-work observation is that I watched Celebrity Apprentice this season. Having never watched the season of American Idol Clay Aiken was on, I had never heard him sing. Oh. My. God. Does he have an amazing voice. I was shocked in a very pleasant way.
For the past 3 weeks, I've been asked: "How do you like the new job?" Ummmm.. I'm thankful for the position and appreciate that I have a job. However, I've learned some key things about me I've carried into this job and here they are:
1. I work to live, not live to work. I know people who live to work and am thankful there are people on the earth who are wired this way, but it's not me.
2. I don't necessarily believe that everyone has to follow their passion as their career. I LOVE cooking, food, eating food, farmer's markets. BUT, do I want to work long hours as a chef? Nope. I'll just keep having my monthly dinner parties instead. For me, I am thankful I have identified my passion and will always have it to relieve stress.
Okay...the rest are observations....
3. My home office is located in NJ...exactly 4 miles from my last employer's home office (yes, I do find this weird). For the 1st 2 weeks I traveled to NJ (luckily, my boss has no issue with me working remotely), but as I was driving the 94 miles to the office, I discovered NJ has a State car -- the BMW SUV. I swear BMW must have secretly left their SUV in the driveways of NJ residents. As I was driving down the highway, there was one in every lane of the 3 lane highway. The runner-up car was Lexus - any make and model.
4. I'm 46, but am still amazed at the stupid things that come out of people's mouths. Day 1, someone was helping me get my badge. They actually said something like this to me: "You know, I'm only taking you around because I was told to". Really? I knew you weren't doing this out of the kindness of your heart, but sometimes, just sometimes, you need to not share your inner voice. I now know how a deer feels when it comes face-to-face with the bright headlights of a car at night. I believe I said: "Thank you, I appreciate it".
5. I think the IT people either hate me or expect an invitation to my house at Thanksgiving. I believe I've called them more than I've talked with my boss. Yes. I'm tech retarded. But, if it weren't for employees like me, these people wouldn't have a job. So....maybe, they really do love me deep down.
6. There is no such thing as the magic cleaning fairy. If she exists, she doesn't come to my house and am pissed. I guess I forgot I no longer have that extra 9 hours a day to clean one or two rooms. If you're wondering why it takes me 9 hours to clean one or two rooms, well, let me tell you why -- when I clean I have a secret cleaning tool and it's called PRO-CRAS-TI-NATION. Don't mistake it with a feather duster or vacuum, it resembles a couch, a t.v., a computer or book. None of which help me empty a dishwasher.
7. Last, but not least, I love working from home. I'm more focused and can wear yoga pants and slippers to work.
Those are my observations about starting work again -- my other non-work observation is that I watched Celebrity Apprentice this season. Having never watched the season of American Idol Clay Aiken was on, I had never heard him sing. Oh. My. God. Does he have an amazing voice. I was shocked in a very pleasant way.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Yin and Yang
I often heard people refer to the "Yin and Yang" of a situation....or what comes up must come down. I've never really been a big believer that if something good happens it is bound that something bad is soon to follow. For the past several years, my life has been more of the snowball effect -- where one thing after another, after another occurs. However, things recently changed and I'm experiencing the Yin & Yang effect.
I'm one to shy away and shut down when things go awry and my life since last September was progressively going on a downward spiral (which also explains my reason for the lack of blog posts). For a person who takes pride for accomplishing a lot, I had to look in the mirror and admit I was failing and even though I was trying, I had absolutely no control. I swallowed my pride, accepted help from loved ones and made calls I dreaded. Needless to say, I cried more than I want to admit.
It was humbling to say the least. I see things differently than I did 4 years, 3 years and even 1 year ago. I've learned what's important, what I'm truly grateful for, and have observed the behavior of people who became uncomfortable with how my life changed and just avoided me because they couldn't or didn't know what to say or do around me.
May 2nd would mark the 4 year anniversary of being unemployed, but recently things have changed. In a 2 week span, I had an interview which was more like an exchange of ideas, was offered a position, and then helped pull together the details of my mother's funeral.
She died quietly after suffering for years from Alzheimer's and had long forgotten who I was. I think she knew she was not enjoying life in a wheelchair and had decided to stop eating and talking for several days before passing. She would have needed a feeding tube and I'm glad my father never had to witness it. For me, my mother's passing was a blessing. I know her quality of life was not one she would have wanted (or anyone would), and am thankful it didn't get worse.
It's amazing how quickly my life has changed. One thing I know for sure is this: If someone told me I could have the lifestyle I had in 2008 without my husband or go through all the shit I did for the past 4 years and have my husband by my side,I choose my husband hands down. He's always been by side to support me, to prop me up while down, but it was during the week of my mother's funeral where this became obvious. While pulling out my hair with my dad and all the funeral details,he quietly comforted me by being there to handle my dad when I couldn't, and doing whatever I needed even when I couldn't form a simple sentence because there were so many details to attend to. He did what I asked, but more importantly he knew to do things for me even when I didn't know I needed the help.
I start work on Monday. Am I happy? Ummm....Yes. I have to admit, with all the events that happened this month, I am not stressed about starting a new job, but instead I feel very calm. Maybe it is because I felt the highs and lows of emotions in the same period of time.....my definition of the Yin and Yang of a situation.
I'm one to shy away and shut down when things go awry and my life since last September was progressively going on a downward spiral (which also explains my reason for the lack of blog posts). For a person who takes pride for accomplishing a lot, I had to look in the mirror and admit I was failing and even though I was trying, I had absolutely no control. I swallowed my pride, accepted help from loved ones and made calls I dreaded. Needless to say, I cried more than I want to admit.
It was humbling to say the least. I see things differently than I did 4 years, 3 years and even 1 year ago. I've learned what's important, what I'm truly grateful for, and have observed the behavior of people who became uncomfortable with how my life changed and just avoided me because they couldn't or didn't know what to say or do around me.
May 2nd would mark the 4 year anniversary of being unemployed, but recently things have changed. In a 2 week span, I had an interview which was more like an exchange of ideas, was offered a position, and then helped pull together the details of my mother's funeral.
She died quietly after suffering for years from Alzheimer's and had long forgotten who I was. I think she knew she was not enjoying life in a wheelchair and had decided to stop eating and talking for several days before passing. She would have needed a feeding tube and I'm glad my father never had to witness it. For me, my mother's passing was a blessing. I know her quality of life was not one she would have wanted (or anyone would), and am thankful it didn't get worse.
It's amazing how quickly my life has changed. One thing I know for sure is this: If someone told me I could have the lifestyle I had in 2008 without my husband or go through all the shit I did for the past 4 years and have my husband by my side,I choose my husband hands down. He's always been by side to support me, to prop me up while down, but it was during the week of my mother's funeral where this became obvious. While pulling out my hair with my dad and all the funeral details,he quietly comforted me by being there to handle my dad when I couldn't, and doing whatever I needed even when I couldn't form a simple sentence because there were so many details to attend to. He did what I asked, but more importantly he knew to do things for me even when I didn't know I needed the help.
I start work on Monday. Am I happy? Ummm....Yes. I have to admit, with all the events that happened this month, I am not stressed about starting a new job, but instead I feel very calm. Maybe it is because I felt the highs and lows of emotions in the same period of time.....my definition of the Yin and Yang of a situation.
Friday, March 9, 2012
Anger: The Train You Sometimes Can't Stop
For the past few days (who am I kidding, the past week), I've been angry. I'm angry at the economy, angry at my situation and what sparked all my feelings of anger is a conversation I had with someone.
I thought I was having lunch with an individual I recently met, but was asked some weird questions AND when I met her with my brown bag lunch, she said she was full, but let's still talk and we ate in company's conference room while she brought a pad of paper with her.
I hate deception. I mean I really despise it. I become guarded and won't reveal anything about myself because I feel if you don't have the decency to be honest with me, why should I really share any of my true opinions with you.
Needless to say, someone who I thought I was going to have lunch on a friendly level turned out to a cluster-fuck of a 45 minute period of time.
That was over a week ago, but learned this week she probably was interviewing me.
Annoyed beyond belief.
I believe in networking, but I don't believe I'm always having to be on an interview with everyone and every encounter.
Unfortunately, I'm just really, really angry. And, if one person tells me to let it go, well, I'll kick them. I know I'll let go, but sometimes you need to let your anger pass all the train stops along its route before moving on.
LMB
- p.s. It doesn't help that I found out yesterday, my cable bill jumped from $100 to $171 to $291 in 3 months AND AT&T doesn't really make their contact information easily accessible. Right now - AT&T SUCKS!
I thought I was having lunch with an individual I recently met, but was asked some weird questions AND when I met her with my brown bag lunch, she said she was full, but let's still talk and we ate in company's conference room while she brought a pad of paper with her.
I hate deception. I mean I really despise it. I become guarded and won't reveal anything about myself because I feel if you don't have the decency to be honest with me, why should I really share any of my true opinions with you.
Needless to say, someone who I thought I was going to have lunch on a friendly level turned out to a cluster-fuck of a 45 minute period of time.
That was over a week ago, but learned this week she probably was interviewing me.
Annoyed beyond belief.
I believe in networking, but I don't believe I'm always having to be on an interview with everyone and every encounter.
Unfortunately, I'm just really, really angry. And, if one person tells me to let it go, well, I'll kick them. I know I'll let go, but sometimes you need to let your anger pass all the train stops along its route before moving on.
LMB
- p.s. It doesn't help that I found out yesterday, my cable bill jumped from $100 to $171 to $291 in 3 months AND AT&T doesn't really make their contact information easily accessible. Right now - AT&T SUCKS!
Winner of What's For Dinner Solution
And Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell wins a copy of What's For Dinner Project!
"Day One:The “What’s for Dinner? " Solution Blogger Project"
Blogger Brian Miller said...
dang so are you making enough for all of us to come over? smiles...sounds delicious to me...smiles.
January 31, 2012 11:17 AM
Delete
Blogger P said...
The venison sounds amazing!
Blogger Ponchogirl said...
Ponchogirl here. It is true? Are you offering to give out the coveted brussel sprouts recipe? My mouth is watering! Will you be sharing with others?
Blogger Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell said...
You are so ambitious with that menu plan, and it all sounds truly delicious!
It'll be interesting to hear your take on everything after you implement some of her tips and strategies!
Blogger DB said...
I made yummy brussel sprout slaw yesterday, and roasted them as well in a marinade of olive oil, dijon mustard, and lemon juice. Totally yummy.
And when I read "family meals", I thought I was going to be reading your blogger thoughts on some of your fave meals (not) from childhood. Cod fish cakes. Glob. Potatoes and cheese soup and hot dogs.
Blogger SillyStud said...
so... ummm... no brussell sprout recipe and no day 2-5???
Blogger SillyStud said...
...and does a man have anything to gain from reading this book?
Blogger busanalayali said...
Thanks lot for this useful article, nice post..
busana muslim
Blogger La La La Leah said...
HEY you still blog! I miss you! I started another blog. Hope all is well.
Blogger lacochran's evil twin said...
So how goes the experiment?
Blogger Brian Miller said...
hehe a shot glass in the kitchen...sure....smiles...just kidding...hey i def would be down with pot pie...
Blogger Bonnie said...
I like the thought of using the biscuits for the top of the chicken pot pie. I might actually make pot pie now! Thanks for the idea.
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