The Energy of Others

No. This isn't a Halloween post. It's actually about the energy a person can give off even when they don't know it.

There are people I've come across that just rub me the wrong way. I can't explain why, I don't wish them harm, but I just don't want to be around them. With friends and classmates from decades ago coming out of the woodwork on Facebook, I have chosen not to pursue some of the people my friends have reconnected with because of my experience with them -- or their energy.

I don't know why, but I've been thinking a lot about how the energies of others impact a person. I don't often share this thought with others because I'm not sure people would get it or think I'm a bit nuts. However, yesterday, I had a very interesting conversation during a care meeting with the staff of the nursing home my mother lives in.

My mom has Alzheimer's. She hasn't recognized me in over 2 years, and really doesn't know anyone at this point. She may know my dad, but can't remember if he's visited her 5 minutes after he's left. During the meeting I found it interesting when I posed the following question to the 3 staff members: "Is my mom more lively when she participates in activities by herself or when my dad is there?"

The 3 staff members looked at one another and the response I got fascinated me -- I was told she is lively when alone. In fact, she becomes docile and quiet if my dad is with her. It was interesting to me because as I grew older, my mom HATED to participate with my dad in activities (e.g., church groups, senior center) because she said my dad over took the whole room. If she signed up for something and he tried to join her, she'd quit. She told me she hated how he had to be the center of attention.

I began to wonder, if my mom doesn't always remember my dad when he visits her, how does she know to be non-responsive when they are at an activity together? I wonder if her intuition takes over and has her know there's something about this man she doesn't appreciate in group settings. I wonder.