Depends Should be the New Sponsor of the Amazing Race

Tuesday, May 5, 2009....

For people who don't watch, The Amazing Race is a reality t.v. show where people do challenging tasks (aka stupid ass stunts) throughout the world (frustrating as hell because you may not speak the language and people have the worst problems getting a taxi)....

So, now that I've given you a premise of the show, let me give you a synopsis of Sunday's episode:

- Still in China
- First Challenge was to either be a make-up artist for the day, or a waiter/waitress in a Chinese restaurant (this would have been funnier if they were in an Italian restaurant).

Parading the street lost as a drag queen wasn't enough, the contestants had a 2nd challenge which was to eat street food.

The food included:

- larva
- scorpions
- crickets
- starfish

I may have left one or two foods out, but the only god send to this challenge was that everything was deep fried (everyone knows everything tastes better when fried).

One sister, Jen, from the sister/sister pair was finishing up the food challenge when another team was just starting. The fatal flaw was that Jen actually ate it slowly and drank A LOT of water between each bite. If Jen had grown up with my brother, she would know how to basically eat food withour tasting it (I don't think my brother ever tasted cauliflower or broccoli).

The other team gave meaning to the term 'fast food'. As the sister/sister team got into their cab for the last leg of the race, the last team at the foodstand had caught up.

Poor Jen, all the water was too much for one bladder. She had to stop when they got to the final destination and use the port-a-potty. That pit stop cost them the race and the chance for a million dollars.

If I were in Jen's position, I know if I stopped to pee, I better muster up all my energy to run from my sister when we lost. Her love of the show and strange belief that we should try out for it (see my entry on Amazing Race) makes me realize that she'd kill me.

If only Jen were wearing Depends then peeing on camera when running wouldn't be embarassing and the sister/sister team would have been in the finale.

Amazing Race...

Tuesday, February 24, 2009....

Since Amazing Race first aired, I believe my sister has been a die-hard fan. I have to admit, I knew of the show, but didn't start watching till late last season. However, with each season, my sister would say, "wouldn't it be cool if we were contestants on the Amazing Race".

Every time she would make this comment, I would either say "no" or "are you crazy?". I didn't watch the show, but knew that you had to get from Point A to Point B, reading maps, begging, but basically always being lost. Ugh.....

My sister hates my driving and knows that I'm directionally challenged. I'm so directionally challenged that I believe everywhere I'm facing is North. I just don't get the people who can tell which way they're facing and proudly declare "East" and be correct. The only consolation I have is knowing I have a 25% chance of being correct when I declare "North".

In addition to being directionally challenged, I would have no desire to beg. Seriously, begging because you have to is one thing, but begging as part of a game show not so fun.

This is all I knew of the show. Over the years and many requests that we should try out, I agreed to this concept. In theory, we'd make a video satisfying my sister's desire, but the video in reality would not be the winning one. How could it? One gung-ho contestant and the other one just hanging back in the video - yeah, last I knew, that makes for compelling reality t.v..

However, I decided to watch the show late last season and am intrigued. Intrigued enough to watch it from the beginning of this season and now understand why my sister would want me as a partner -- to do all the challenges that have a "height" factor to it.

I'd have to bungee jump and para sail, which I'm fine with. However, I would want some discussion as to who is going to step up to the plate to do the new challenge. I would want some mystery of who is going to hurl themselves off a building or bridge. A life with some mystery is fun.

Sis, knowing what I know now, we could still make the video. However, I'm almost certain, more than my guesses of N/S/E/W, we wouldn't be chosen.

Shout Outs...

Monday, October 19, 2009....


Over the weekend, two people accomplished amazing feats that I want to recognize.

IRL, my friend Sue, an amazing athlete who come rain or shine, works out at 4:30 a.m. daily, placed 2nd in a 4 woman boat coming in 2 seconds after the first place winner.

When I was texting her the other night, she was disappointed and I quickly pointed out that she could row an amazing race and come in 2nd or .....be sitting on the couch watching t.v..

Sometimes people don't recognize their accomplishments and need lazy couch potatoes, like me, to remind them how AWESOME they are.

Sue, does not have a blog, but the other shout out I want to give does --Living and Loving in LA who ran in the Nike Women's Marathon this past weekend.

My favorite tweet was this: "Mile 11 and all we can think about is beer. Oh, and the finish line! Only 15m to go!"

If you have a moment, stop by Erin's blog and congratulate her. I've walked a marathon and remember the months of training and what it takes. IT'S HUGE!