Depends Should be the New Sponsor of the Amazing Race

Tuesday, May 5, 2009....

For people who don't watch, The Amazing Race is a reality t.v. show where people do challenging tasks (aka stupid ass stunts) throughout the world (frustrating as hell because you may not speak the language and people have the worst problems getting a taxi)....

So, now that I've given you a premise of the show, let me give you a synopsis of Sunday's episode:

- Still in China
- First Challenge was to either be a make-up artist for the day, or a waiter/waitress in a Chinese restaurant (this would have been funnier if they were in an Italian restaurant).

Parading the street lost as a drag queen wasn't enough, the contestants had a 2nd challenge which was to eat street food.

The food included:

- larva
- scorpions
- crickets
- starfish

I may have left one or two foods out, but the only god send to this challenge was that everything was deep fried (everyone knows everything tastes better when fried).

One sister, Jen, from the sister/sister pair was finishing up the food challenge when another team was just starting. The fatal flaw was that Jen actually ate it slowly and drank A LOT of water between each bite. If Jen had grown up with my brother, she would know how to basically eat food withour tasting it (I don't think my brother ever tasted cauliflower or broccoli).

The other team gave meaning to the term 'fast food'. As the sister/sister team got into their cab for the last leg of the race, the last team at the foodstand had caught up.

Poor Jen, all the water was too much for one bladder. She had to stop when they got to the final destination and use the port-a-potty. That pit stop cost them the race and the chance for a million dollars.

If I were in Jen's position, I know if I stopped to pee, I better muster up all my energy to run from my sister when we lost. Her love of the show and strange belief that we should try out for it (see my entry on Amazing Race) makes me realize that she'd kill me.

If only Jen were wearing Depends then peeing on camera when running wouldn't be embarassing and the sister/sister team would have been in the finale.