Monday, September 7, 2009

Crayons

Monday, September 7, 2009....


I'm currently reading Lovely Bones (a wonderful read for anyone who hasn't already read it) and although the overall theme of the book is sad, there is one particular passage which struck a cord with me. The passage described how two young boys colored for so long that they were exhausted and fell asleep right at the table. After reading the passage, I began to wonder when did I stop doing this? When did I stop caring about the pleasure something brought me and only became focused on the outcome?

I've noticed over the years I just stop myself from trying something new because I have determined I will not reach the desired outcome I'm looking for. I've seemed to forgotten the process, the journey of getting from Point A to Point B.

It's not only a fear of failing, it's sometimes the thought of succeeding that scares me more. Instead of just doing something, enjoying the process, I stop and sabotage myself.

I want to be those boys in the book. I want to color like there is no tomorrow and not care if I fail or succeed. That's what I want.

Now, the real question is: How do I get passed me?

26 comments:

otin said...

Great thought! For me, it is not the fear of failing, but instead, the fear of the process that it takes to do anything.

LiLu said...

I've been feeling very... complacent, lately, as well. Sigh.

La La La Leah said...

I say do it! You are the only one stopping you!

Green-Eyed Momster said...

Louise Hay's positive affirmations helped me replace negative thoughts with positive ones. They were a very important part of me getting clean. You are only limited if you think you are....

I always remind myself, especially after loved ones pass away that sometimes, today is all that matters. My bff just lost her brother and he was only 45 years old. I say live today like there's no tomorrow!

I also liked the book Five Wishes.

Hugs!!

Sunshinemeg said...

I read Lovely Bones too and loved it. Interesting thought.

Emma said...

One of my favorite books! The film is out in December! :) x

Joanna Jenkins said...

That's a great book. There's a movie version coming out soon too.
xo

otin said...

I added my job seeking friends, I did not want to exclude anyone!

torigabrielle said...

I love that book, it really is wonderful and it makes you think. Interesting thought. If you've been thinking a lot about that you should probably read The Last Lecture next. The whole point of The Last Lecture is reflecting back on who you were as a child and achieving your childhood dreams.

jane said...

i can relate. i once read that everyone has a little voice in their head preaching doom and gloom- just some people ignore it better than others... knowing that we are all in the same boat made me feel better... does this help?... p.s. i read the lovely bones and suffered all the way through- i´m such a lightweight...

Teresa @ Grammy Girlfriend said...

Great post....enjoyed your blog...Hope you will stop by and visit my new Christmas blog. There is a great giveaway that ends tonight...
http://grammyababychangeseverything.blogspot.com

JennyMac said...

Don't be your biggest hurdle Little Ms....get out there and shine!

DB said...

Ah, but if it's something you haven't tried yet, how can you determine if the outcome will be to your liking? Besides, you might discover something else in the process you'd rather try. I say go for it, whatever it is!

Constructive Attitude said...

I want that too! To be happy with what im doing.

a corgi said...

I heard good things about that book but haven't read it yet; I'll need to check it out; I'm not sure how to get past you; I find myself wondering sometimes the same things about myself; we are often our own worst enemies, aren't we?

betty

mylittlebecky said...

SUCH a great book! i think sometimes we can lose ourselves in adultness... hopefully we'll all find something to bring us back :)

Captain Dumbass said...

Getting past yourself is the hardest part. I started writing this year (like actual writing, not blogging) just for the hell of it. I don't have any pretensions that I'm going to get published or make money or whatever, its just for me, and it's great.

Pick up a crayon.

controlled chaos said...

huh.
wow...
it's something most people would never pick up on.

thank you for sharing

Badass Geek said...

Interesting thought... I don't think many of us find the pleasure in just doing something, instead of being concerned for the outcome.

Melanie's Randomness said...

I had a coupon this weekend for Borders & actually picked up that book. Now I'm definitely gunna read it. =)

Little Ms Blogger said...

Otin - hmmm....I can see that.

LiLu - Yup. Exactly.

La La - Easier said than done.

Green-Eyed - I like the saying "you're only limited if you think you are". I'm definitely going to repeat that one to self. A LOT.

Sunshine Meg - Finally happy with a good read (last 3 books just okay).

emma- I'm really enjoying it.

joanna - Can't wait for it. Great cast.

torigabelle - I've heard him do the last lecture, need to pick up the book. I've heard it's amazing.

jane - I wish I had ear plugs for that little voice.

Theresa - thanks - I'll stop by, but missed the giveaway

jennyMac - I'm trying to work on it.

DB - It's not necessarily anything new that's the problem, it's worry about the results.

Constructive Attitude - Wouldn't it be nice to just stop worrying.

a corgi - you should definitely pick up the book and I'm hardest on my self.

mylittlebecky - It sucks at times to be an adult.

Captain Dumbass - I need to fin something, otherwise, I'll live a life of complacency and that's not what I want.

controlled chaos - thanks for reading and commenting. I appreciate it.

Badass Geek - That's my problem - the outcome paralyzes me.

Hannah said...

I also read Lovely Bones and liked it very much. Reading is a great hobby, but have you thought about finding other hobbies as well. They can bring so much pleasure.

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Little Ms Blogger said...

Hannah - Reading is not my only hobby, in fact, it is very low down on a list of many other hobbies I enjoy.

♥ Braja said...

Don't mind me, I'm just stalking Otin, Joanna, and Captain around. Someone has to watch 'em.

Ahhh, what to say....it's a long conversation, this one. But I would love to invite you to my blog and you can read a few there that touch on this....as you wish...xoxo

Helen McGinn said...

I loved that book. My old school friend, Lynne Ramsay got the rights to making the film but due to certain complications, gave it up to another director. So, watch out for it coming out on film.

I think it's hard when you are in that frame of mind but it is the little step that gets you there; focus on one thing, one thing you'd like to do for the sheer enjoyment. If bigger things come of it, great and there is nothing wrong in keeping an eye open for opportunity: my kids will sit an make houses for hours out of paper, down to people, wallets with money etc. It's fun to watch but if my husband suggests making me some food or I suggest snacks to him, they immediately perk up their little heads and say "what about us?". So even little kids, enjoying themselves completely keep an eye out for opportunity. So don't give yourself too much of a hard time.

Alexis AKA MOM said...

It's amazing how we loose this, I look at the boys and love how they have that attitude. I'm the same way how do I loose this part of me, trying to fit myself into the square peg of life?

That really is an amazing book :)